March 5, 2023

Ever since Tuesday, February 21st, I have felt His Presence, continuously. I mentioned previously that I feel lonely sometimes, but I've never felt alone. He is why - Felicia's family and I have continuously dwelt on Him and in His Word (we should ALWAYS dwell on His Word) and have remained close to Him. Were it not for Yeshua, for His Holy Spirit, for the Hand of Yahweh, I'd be a horrible, broken, empty mess.

Even though my heart is in a billion pieces, He holds them all in His Hands, helping me put it back together. Even though my soul feels crushed, His Spirit is removing this unbearable weight so that I may continue climbing this million-mile mountain.

Today is going to be one of those days... one of those hard, boulder-climbing days. But as long as we call upon Jesus to be with us, he'll be in our midst, comforting our shattered hearts and healing our crushed souls.

I long to return to that Tuesday morning to see her again, to hold her, to help her. But I can't look to the past. Jesus says the past is the past and to let tomorrow worry about itself. He says to focus on the here and now. I've always lived my life this way, it's one of the traits Felicia loved about me - how I can just let the past stay in the past. I need to honor her by doing so, now.

I'm moving forward, up this million-mile path, ready to encounter whatever obstacles are in my way. I just pray I don't abandon Yahweh because He has NOT abandoned me. At all. I feel Him all around, and it's comforting now.

I love you, Felicia. I miss you. I know you're fully healed and singing praises to Our King. This brings my heart, in its million pieces, joy. I love you, angel. Always. Forever. #Fiercely