May 14, 2023

My wife exemplified these traits. She was a Proverbs 31 woman. She was truly a woman who did her best to speak with wisdom and kindness when needed. She was a great example of how a Christian Woman should behave.

These were some of her many traits that attracted me to her. Her #character is what helped, 22 years ago, bring me back to the path Yahweh created for me. I love that about Felicia. Her #faith made mine stronger. If it weren't for her faith, there's no telling where I would be right now. I am eternally #grateful to her for allowing Our Father to use her so that I could return to Him.

Now, nearly 12 weeks after her sudden and unexpected passing, I need to keep this faith He restored in me. I need to keep showing the world who God is; who His Son, Yeshua, is. I need to bring Him all #Glory and #Honor and #Praise for being who He is: a #Just and #Righteous God whom #Loves His creation.

I need to grab Jesus' outstretched hands above these stormy waters, walk to the lakeshore, and continue my climb up this million-mile mountain. With His Healing Hands, mending my shattered heart, with His Spirit lifting this immovable weight, and with God's Love comforting my crushed soul, I know I can summit this mountain. I also know it's going to be a while, yet, before this #pain and #torment of my brokenness will be quieted.

The sudden #hurt and #heartache I felt when I came back home yesterday was overwhelming. Even though my trip was very therapeutic, my return refractured the healed parts of my torn heart. February 21 suddenly happened all over again, and the pain of having just lost my favorite part of me became fresh again. I wasn't expecting that, and it hurt. Tremendously.

But He's still got me in His Hands. He's still carrying and healing my shredded heart. I can feel Him with me. I know He's working on me. And I'm #thankful for that. I'm thankful I have Him as my Lord and Savior. I'd be in shambles were it not for the Love from my God.

Thank you, Felicia, for reintroducing me to Our Father 22 years ago. Thank you for loving me when I felt unlovable. Thank you for being my wife.

I love you. Always. Forever. #Fiercely