March 6, 2023

This was the Verse of the Day from a year ago... this is how I've been approaching Yahweh - with weeping and mourning. I haven't fasted... yet. But during my walk up this million-mile mountain, I've been closer to Him than I ever have in my nearly 49 years of life.

Adonai is amazing. His Love is boundless; His Guidence is full of Hope and Peace. Yesterday's experience during the cremation is something I will never forget - Yeshua was with us; His Spirit surrounded us in Love and Peace. What I thought (and expected) was going to happen (me falling to my knees in agony) didn't. At all. I stood there, family by my side, with God holding me upright, giving me a Peace so undefined, I can't articulate what I felt.

Yesterday's boulder turned out to be just a pebble. Yahweh made yesterday a Wonderful, Peaceful, Powerful, Joyful experience. I hope you all can understand just how incredible it really was, crossing that milestone... with Yahweh dwelling there, Yeshua in our Midst, and His Spirit surrounding us, I felt more Love and Joy at that moment than I ever have. It was truly amazing and I'm so thankful I listened to Our Father when I decided to take that step and witness the start of the process (this was offered to us by the mortuary, but I could have declined).

My heart is healing (Yeshua is putting it back together), my soul is feeling less pressure (The Spirit is lifting the weight), and my very being is being led forward, God's Hand in mine, guiding me up this million-mile path. I'm sure there will be other boulders in my way, but if yesterday is any indication, these, too, will be mere pebbles. I can't explain just how incredible my Spirit feels right now. I'm so thankful I know the #Truth. I'd be lost, miserably lost, without Him.

I love and miss my gorgeous angel. I still long for her laugh, her smile, her touch... but I celebrate the #fact she's whole, again; she's in no more pain, no more suffering. She's surrounded by and full of Yahweh's Everlasting #Love, a love we cannot fully experience until we unite with Him. Felicia is experiencing it, now, and that makes me happy.

I love you, Felicia. I've loved you since I've known what love is, way before we met. And I'll always love you. Forever. #Fiercely.