#Love Still…

March 19, 2023

I love my wife... I loved her since even before I knew her. My shattered heart loves Felicia #Fiercely... but I love the Lord even more. My #Love for Him is tested daily, but I can't NOT love Him. It is my love for Him which has helped me continue this million-mile climb up this mountain.

I'm weak. I'm broken. I'm lonely. Without Him, I'd be a shell of a man, barely eating, barely breathing... barely alive. I lean on Yeshua because I know I can't take this journey without Him. Each time I try, I fall... I fail.

Felicia loved me fiercely, too. And she wouldn't want me to just be a drone, blindly walking about. She would want me to seek the Lord and #Trust in Him. My desire to be with Yeshua during these times isn't because it's what Felicia would have wanted. No. It's because there's no way I can make it up this path without Him. None. I know this.

So, while I mourn my beautiful, sweet, intelligent, loving, witty, funny, sexy wife, I know I need to keep trudging up this mountain; I know I need to continue on my journey through healing. Jesus has my heart - He's healing it. His Spirit is comforting and relieving my crushed soul. I'm being worked on...

But I still weep for Felicia. I still miss her loving embrace, her gentle kiss, her sweet smile... I have a billion happy memories of her, and this helps. What helps even more, though, is knowing she's healed and whole and ALIVE in His Glory! She's made anew in His Presence. And this comforts me.

I love you, Felicia. Always. Forever. Fiercely.